10. TV Ads Begin "From the sparkling waters of Lake Erie. . ."

9. The second you take a sip, your liver explodes

8. For some reason, it's sold in the detergent aisle

7. It was actually brewed by Penny Marshall and Cindy Williams

6. Instead of a wagon pulled by Clydesdales, beer company has a wheelbarrow pushed by a doped-up monkey

5. The company isn't running any sort of sweepstakes, but the underside of the bottle caps all say "Sorry"

4. Tastes more like a mountain goat than a mountain stream

3. Picture on label is of a guy throwing up

2. Your girlfriend announces she's leaving you for Billy Dee Williams

1. When you crack a couple open on a fishing trip and say, "It doesn't get any better than this," your buddies kill themselves