Sam: Well, points to Miller for at least coming up with a semi-cool retro label. It'll look good in the collection. And the beer was pleasant enough in that it didn't create esophageal spasm or malignant reflux. Pale yellow, fizzy, very little aroma and no hops bite whatsoever. Sigh...not as watery as Miller Lite, but not as much flavor as Miller High Life, which is two bucks a six-pack cheaper. I'm such a sucker. (5/27/2006)


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Sam: Alright, so here's the deal. I'm writing this review while three sheets in the wind. Now if you're insulted by that, leave now and go to a serious review site; we're here for fun. And besides, can you really take seriously a Miller product (already crummy at best) adulterated with lime and salt? I thought not. Moving on, I encountered this several days ago and laughed out loud. "No way," I thought. But being the altruistic, human-centered hand-holding mama-type I am, I decided to suck it up and take the bullet for you gentle readers. so I coughed up the nearly eight bucks for a six-pack and tried a couple. Outcome: those of you with kids have no doubt lived through stomach viruses at your house, and have had to live on Pedialyte for a few days until stomachs settle. Well, picture Miller Beer mixed with some sort of lemon-lime-Pedialyte concoction, and there you have this beer. It is unspeakably foul and in a vomit-green bottle to boot. So knock yourselves out if you want to try it, but don't be pissed if you have stomach spasms, come back here to bitch, and be met with my "I told you so." And you're welcome for my taking the bullet. And now I'm going to go raise the fourth sheet... (3/17/2007)


Steve: This is a "chelada" style beer. Chelada is defined by The Urban Dictionary as the following: (n) "The liquid created by rotting refuse in communal garbage dumps in Mexican peasant villages." OK, that's kind of crap, but then again, so is this beer. To be honest, it's better tasting than most Miller products. It's made with salt and lime, and the lime is very evident in the taste, but in the smell, it's salty, like ocean water, and not at all pleasant. This would be passable as a lawnmower beer if you have sinus congestion, or in Beer Can Chicken, to give the chicken a nice lime flavor, but there is nothing else redeemable about this. I believe it's Miller's attempt to compete with Corona, and I'll give them that, it's better than Corona, but that's like comparing a Fiat to a Ford Pinto. (7/4/2007)


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Steve: At one time, this was my favorite beer. Compared to what I drink now, this is very watery, so the taste is not there. However, it does seem to be thirst-quenching. The one beer that never gave me a hangover the next day after having too many. No difference in flavor between regular and light.


Kris: At one time, this was MY favorite beer. Back in my bowling days. Yep, bowling and drinking, go together like Simon and Garfunkel, Van Halen and David Lee Roth, New Jersey and you, Kurt Cobain and a shotgun, Van Halen and Sammy Hagar, well, you get the point. You bowl, you drink. Repeat. And my beer of choice was MGD. Then I quit working at the bowling alley and got a better tasting beer. (9/23/2006)


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Steve: See MGD.


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Steve: This is the granddaddy of the Miller line, the equivalent of seeing someone smoke unfiltered Lucky Strikes...you're just not going to see your buddies in their 20's drink this. My choice for this "Champagne of Beers" was the 24 oz can, AKA "The Silo" as it's known in Wisconsin (I was paying for gas at the Mobil in Merrill WI, saw this in the cooler, and decided "it was time"). This was the classic can, with the girl sitting in the crescent moon, Miller's official logo from about a century ago. You can taste the can when drinking, and when poured into a glass that metallic hint is still there. However, I believe this is higher in alcohol than most, so by the time you drink the whole Silo, I'm not sure you'd care. If you don't care about calories, I would suggest this over MGD or Miller Lite, but I'd recommend you try it from a bottle. Actually, not a bad beer when compared to other "American Light Lagers" (beer-speak for cheap mega-brewed beer), so when comparing in context, it earns points. Don't make fun of this, folks, this could be your new cheap beer when money is tight. (11/2/2002)


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Sam: I can understand this beer. For years, Miller High Life was all my Dad drank, so we shared more than a few. Yeah, this is the light version, but tastes largely the same. I felt guiltily cheap drinking this last night; I drank it from a 32 oz. can (maybe this review should be on the Malt Liquor page?). Still, I poured some up, too, and it's the color you'd expect: anemic yellow. Good frothy head, though. Now this is not a banquet beer. Not your first line. But hey, if you're at a barbeque and this is all that's iced down, at least it won't kill you. And if you've got a little nostalgia for the old Gold Can, you might even view it with some favor. (3/5/2005)


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Kris: As with all of the big three megaswill brewers, the ad campaign is excellent. However, the beer is sub-par. Too watery for my taste. I would drink this if there was nothing else.


Steve: Even though it would take me less than one second to name 10 better beers than Miller Lite, this does beat Bud and Coors in the mass-produced market. If you're cheap, in college, or just like the taste of flavored water, stick with this.


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Steve: See Icehouse. Same company, same taste.


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Steve: Probably the best domestic mass-made brew I've ever had. It has a good strong flavor compared to Miller Brewing Company's weaker cousins. A bit darker in color, almost like an ale or amber, and higher in alcohol. I've even used this as a marinade for Bratwursts. Very fresh, very smooth going down, no bitterness.


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Steve: This sucks. Badly. Not as bad as Natty Light, but not as good as Bud, which should tell you something. This is Miller's response to Natural Light to catch the trailer park crowd. Cheaply made, cheaply sold. No excuse for a beer.


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Guest Review - KennyNC: Steve says that the Beast "sucks...no excuse for a beer." I can buy that. But since I was low on funds today, about all I could afford was Milwaukee's Best Ice. At a whopping 5.9% alcohol by volume, I figured that after two or three I could forget what I was drinking anyway. I was also raised to believe there is some good in all people and all things. Well, this swill really put my upbringing to the test. Sure, I got drunk. But getting drunk with MB Ice is like making a million dollars as a proctologist for Rosie O'donnell...you might reach your goal, but the journey is far too unpleasant for most. I give this beer two mugs only because being ice-brewed gives it more of a punch, but by God I'm working overtime next week so I can afford something good. (8/25/2001)


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Steve: Dude, do you need money? Can I lend you a buck, so that you can get Miller Lite? Everything OK? Did your doctor tell you that your urinary system had to be flushed? These are the questions that I would ask if I saw someone around me drinking "Beast Light." Of course, the last time I actually saw someone spend money on this was in 1994 while I was in college, but it holds true today. Any beer that inspires me to want to lend money to someone so that they can get a better beer is not earning a lot of points. (11/15/2003)


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Guest Review - Chris J: Hmmm. How to rate this so-called beer...Better than O'Doul's...yet has an undescribable bad taste. How about: slightly better than the worst! (9/22/2001)


Guest Review - KennyNC: If I ever drank a Miller product by choice, it would involve wanting to get drunk at a reasonable price. This product offers neither benefit. Call me sexist, but when I see a girl drink this, I think, "Very responsible of her to be the designated driver." When I see a guy drink it, I think, "He needs his ass kicked." (9/22/2001)


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Kris: I'll be honest, I didn't really like this. Perhaps it had something to do with the taste. Unfortunately, I couldn't put my finger on what it tasted like, exactly. Maybe if I hadn't just had a Bacardi Silver right before trying it, I'd have liked it better, but I doubt it. I'll be sticking with Bacardi or Smirnoff for my malternative beverage of choice. (4/26/2003)


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