Steve: Answer: Awesome hockey players and fantastic beer. Question: What are two things to which Americans could not hold the Czech Republic's jock? The more Czech beers I try, the more I want to visit that country. Preferably in October, when hockey has started up, but that's negotiable. People don't realize it, but the Czech Republic has the ultimate Napoleon complex...a little country that has an insane vision of being better than their past oppressors, at all costs. This was proven by their 1-0 beating of Russia in the 1998 Olympics in hockey (which was second only to the US beating the USSR in 1980 in the semifinals) and being better than the Germans at brewing beer. This beer proves my theory. This beer is Elias and Sykora flying in on an odd-man-rush, or Hasek stopping 3 shots while laying on his back, facing away from the play..... simply a beautiful thing that almost takes your breath away. To compare this to Bud is like comparing Czech supermodel Paulina Porizkova to her husband, Rick Ocasik (pardon me if I butchered the spelling). I think you get my point. Excuse me, I need to call my travel agent. (4/7/2001)


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Sam: Sigh...Steve was right. We've been chatting about this one on the Forums, and he mentioned being underwhelmed. I'm drinking one right now, and have to agree. It's a handsome golden color, and has an enticing malty aroma. But the flavor's just...I dunno, thin, I guess. Like a very watery Budvar. And even though this comes in a green bottle, I did NOT get a skunked batch, so it's not that. What a shame. I had high hopes for this beer. (10/21/2006)


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Steve: What is this beer, you ask? Where is this brewery, you ask? Never heard of it, you say? Well, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Holy Grail of beer, the beer that Michail Jackson suggested is worth a trip to the Czech Republic to drink it. This, my friends, is the one, the only BUDWEISER BUDVAR!!!!! This is the beer that has locked legal horns with Anheuser Busch for DECADES. The beer that couldn't be sold in America under it's current name (which is why they changed it to Czechvar in the US). How was it, you ask? Eh, it was OK. NO IT WASN'T!!! IT WAS F'IN AWESOME. You mary's out there WISH you could get this beer. To those of you who think that any beer stronger than Bud is motor oil, YOU AREN'T MAN ENOUGH TO DRINK THIS BEER! If your idea of a good time is going home to your trailer, opening a can of Busch Light, petting your mangy dog and saying "ah, this is the life," then this beer is not for you, just like a Jaguar is not for you. Want to know how this tasted? READ THIS REVIEW! How do you think it tastes? Like the greatest God-danged lager I've ever had (except for Schwarzer Adler, that was better, but it was fresher). Don't like this because it doesn't have a born-on date? Who cares! Most of you aren't smart enough to know how long a beer can last, so who cares?!!! Paulina Poriskova, Petr Sykora, Patrick Elias and Czechvar. God, I love the Czech Republic!!! (9/8/2001)


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Steve: There isn't a huge variety of Schwarzbiers available in the US, and most of them are from Germany. If you live in Wisconsin, you can usually get lucky with their microbreweries, but otherwise you're out of luck. Fortunately, a fair amount of Czech beers are available here in Atlanta, this being one of them. So, I was able to sit down with a tall glass of Herold's Schwarzbier while watching 24. Watching those seconds tick away, seeing the bad guys come after Jack Bauer, all while drinking Herold made for an enjoyable Monday night. Much better then their Hefeweizen. (8/27/2005)


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Steve: This is a Bohemian take on a Bavarian beer style (and for those who don't know, Bohemia is a province in the Czech Rep, it's not brewed by hippies), using local wheat and pilsner malts and yeast bartered from a Bavarian brewery. It's a lot lighter than German Hefeweizen, and actually comes similar to many American versions of that style, so I guess it has to be judged the same way....a poor copy. Not a bad beer overall, but not very good in-style. Unlike UFO or Saranac, I had no problem finishing this one, I was just left wanting more. (8/20/2005)


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Steve: When I bought this, was I mentally comparing the phrases "Golden Revolution" and "Golden Shower"? Yes, I was. But, aside from that, trust me, you'll like this. Maybe not the price, but definitely the flavor. Imperial Pilsners are much more common in US microbreweries, so it's nice to see a European brewery known for lager beers doing one. Herold really breaks the chains of traditional lagers and produces something with some solid kick. It came in a nice 750ml corked bottle, and when I saw it I knew I had to have it. And I wasn't the least disappointed. This is one of those beers that is making me want to reconsider many previous beer reviews I've written because those other beers can't possibly be as good as this. (5/2/2009)


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Steve: There isn't anything about this dark that separates it from the rest of the pack. I really want something a bit more smoky, a bit thicker, in dark beers, and this didn't really do it. I'm sure this review will piss off some beer snob that will get bent out of shape that I insulted his favorite beer, but I was too bored with this beer to really care what anyone thinks of my review. (6/9/2007)


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Steve: The bottle recommends storing in a cool place. I would recomment leaving it in that cool place. Forever. Maybe someday an archaeologist will find it. Let it be his friggin' problem. I sure as hell wouldn't want to drink it again. Possibly one of the most disappointing European beers I've ever had. I drank it all. But I sure as hell didn't like it. At all. (8/5/2006)


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Steve: This was your classic, central European pilsner. In fact, I liked it better than Urquell, but I will probably be slammed for saying that. Not much to say except the usual pilsner cliches, crisp, refreshing, clean, light tasting. The only difference is quality. This has it. Bud still doesn't.


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Steve: This was much better than Rebel. It comes in a somewhat expensive ($7) six pack, but you get a good 2 liters out of it, a better deal than Rebel. This had a slightly woody flavor, like it was filtered through, I dont know, good tasting wood (yeah, I know, that sounds stupid, but bear with me). This is definitely what I think of when I think about central European beers. You will enjoy this one. Of course, the price is prohibitive to some, but I guess youll just have to make it one of those beers you treat yourself to at Christmas. (7/21/2001)


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Steve: This is a dark beer. And how. Very dark indeed. Not Sam Smith's Oatmeal Stout dark (Osama Bin Laden's heart isn't that dark), but pretty darn dark, just let me say that. This is probably not for the faint of heart. If Petr Sykora is a basic, light Czech pilsner, then this beer is Bobby Holik: big, thick, scarred, with one eyebrow and looking like Frankenstein, like a guy who you either don't want to meet in a dark alley, or the guy who you want escorting you through the alley. This is powerful stuff. Also, for convenience, this comes in a .5L bottle, perfect for shoving up Jerry Falwell's rectum, thick-end first, while reading the lyrics to an Ozzy Osborne song to him. Sorry, had to be said. This has been a crappy week, and I'm still a little bitter that he compares my USA to a modern-day Sodom and Gomora (sp?). (10/20/2001)


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Steve: Further proof that Czech beers do not, in fact, give me an erection. This is a Bohemian-style Schwarzbier. And I can attest to the fact that yes, the beer is indeed a black color. But other than that, this was virtually indistinguishable from normal lagers. A Schwarzbier should make you think you just drank liquefied Pumpernickel bread, or at least drank a beer filtered through a dirty hitchhiker's sock. This tasted like the lager with food coloring. It's almost as though the Czech Republic is fucking with me now. (1/14/2007)


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Steve: I know that most of you must think I have this incredible hard-on for Czech beers (figuratively speaking, of course....I'd like to think that none of you actually think I get a woody over breweries with "Pivovar" in their name). But hopefully this will balance it out. This was an absolutely unremarkable beer. One of those where you think afterwards, "if I've had one eastern European lager, I've had them all." This could've been brewed in Poland, Slovakia, Russia, Lithuania, or Germany by any number of substandard breweries. Of course, now that I've said this, some nerdy US foreign exchange student is going to write me to tell me this was all he drank while living with his Czech host family, and due to the language barrier, he never stopped to notice they were a bunch of raging alcoholics that did nothing but watch Czech translations of "All in the Family." (12/16/2006)


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Steve: This is the basic line of Lobie beers (they need to be introduced to Leinie, I think), that being, as the bottle says, "Traditional Czech Lager." And that's exactly what it is, truth in advertising. There is nothing flashy about this one, but there doesn't need to be. Just as long as it tastes good, right? Can I get an Amen, my brothers? This is exactly what a lager should taste like. Almost like it was easy, but then why does Bud keep screwing it up? (10/20/2001)


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Steve: Even better than the light lager. This was a thick, hoppy, malty lager, that is great with red meat! To put it into terms that everyone can understand, Beck's Dark and Heineken Dark couldn't hold this beer's jock! This is a beer to relax with, and talk about later. This had syrupy hints to it. God it was good. (12/17/1998)


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Steve: I'd like to think that this is what Patrick Elias, my favorite Devil, throws down when he visits his home country of the Czech Republic. This is the best Czech lager I've personally had to date. Crisp, refreshing, easy to drink, the main points any lager should hit. Not hoppy at all. Not that hops are bad, but a lager should be distinct from ales. And this definitely is. (10/25/1998)


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Steve: Urquell, Czech for "Source" (and no, I'm not making that up...this time). As in, the source from which all other pilsner-style lagers have sprung. Pilsner Urquell pioneered such beers that we see today. In fact, in German, Pilsner means "Something or someone from the City of Pilsn," so this beer is the only one that can truly be called a Pilsner. It has a distinctive sharp flavor from the Saaz hops that most BudMillerCoors fans, through ignorance, will attribute to skunking after long months in a green bottle. Trust me, however, that's just a well-crafted lager using ingredients you're not familiar with (oh yeah, that pleasant taste? that indicates a total lack of rice). It's owned by the same congomerate as Miller Lite, but don't confuse the two....at family reunions, people keep coming up to Lite and asking it why it can't be more like it's handsome, more flavorful cousin, Pilsner. Not my favorite of the Czech lagers, but as the original, it is more than deserving of my homage.


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Steve: Yet another addition to Lobkowicz' royalty line (and for those who wake up in the morning just to point out my mistakes: first, bite me, and second, I'm aware that's not what they call it, that's just what I have nicknamed it). This was a welcome addition to my fridge. Actually, a basic typical Czech beer. Now, that might not sound like a glowing review, but when you say that someone is a typical New Jersey Devil (or, for that matter, a typical NJ Devil fan) you know automatically that he is a complete stud, so when you do likewise for Czech beers, you know it's worth dropping a nickel and buying. More on the light side, as opposed to your average bock, and a bit more refreshing. Something that wouldn't be out of place in the summer. I just wish Lobie (again, my nickname) would've made it easy and marketed a sample pack with all of their beers in it. Oh, and in case you're wondering about other comparisons, when one says that a beer is typical for Anheuser Busch, you can use the NY Rangers as a comparison: Old, stale, not much thought going into it, and with their stars out of rehab, not enough alcohol to make the trip worthwhile. (10/9/2001)


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Steve: Decent, but it had kind of a stale taste to it. I wish I could say more about it, but all in all it's undistinguishable from other European lagers like Beck's, Heineken, etc. Maybe it's because I had it in the winter, when this would probably be a better summertime beer. Comes in a 1/2 liter bottle, 5% ABV. (5/15/2004)


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Steve: This wasn't exactly one of the best Czech beers I've ever had. It comes in a 1/2L bottle costing a few bucks, so it's also questionable wether or not it's worth the price. It was good, I did finish the whole thing, and I did enjoy it, and I would have it again.....if it was cheaper. On the upside, if I bought this at a bar, it would have cost $6-$8, so maybe I got a deal. I know this isn't exactly the most glamorous of reviews, but I'm just being honest. If you can afford it, I recommend it. If you drink Bud not for the taste but for the price, you won't like this beer. For all I know, this is the Budweiser of the Czech Republic. Of course, it goes without saying that this still blows away Bud. No question. (7/1/2001)


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Steve: This is somewhat equivalent to Lev's Black Lion, but not quite as good. Pretty dark, thick, a bit hoppy. Goes down a lot thicker than any Czech lager. Nice purplish color to the label (I guess that would be the garnet), so it is certain to raise questions about one's masculinity. Unless you're a woman drinking this, in which case it will be forever branded a chick drink among your friends. Fortunately, I drank it on Christmas night at home, where no smartass friends would snicker. Certainly not bad, but this will likely cost you, if your local retailer is anything like the one I get my imports from. They are certainly bent on making a profit. Fortunately, this is available in a .5L bottle (I didn't see it in a six pack), so it's not a long-term investment if you don't like it. (12/26/2001)


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Sam: Brewed in the same town as the legendary Budvar, this is also a very old Czech lager. I went hunting it when a reader mentioned finding it in Texas. So I found it. So I tried it. So I was unimpressed. I hate that; I'll bet it has more to do with local distributors having a tough time getting fresh product. I mean, I tried Budvar locally, too, and wasn't thrilled. I tried a fresher batch in Alabama (go figure), and it was delicious. So probably Samson is brilliant if fresh. You might try it in your area, but if you live in Texas, pass it by. It wasn't lousy, but it wasn't worth the seven bucks I shelled out for it. (9/5/2004)


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Steve: Translated to mean "The Star of Prague," this lager far exceeds in taste that of its Czech cousin Pilsner Urquell. This beer had an almost woody flavor to go along with its malty refreshing taste. definitely a must-try if you are into Central European lagers. I'll have to remember to get a six pack of this when I see the Devils play this year, in honor of their awesome Czech players. (9/12/2002)


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Steve: Zatec is the Czech word for one of the most famous words in brewing....."Saaz," as in Saaz Hops, the variety of hops that are grown in that region. Yes, readers, I finally did some actual research (technically, I stumbled across this info). Zatec is Czech for Saaz. The floral aroma and taste are immediately evident. I guess when your beer shares the same name as one of the most famous varieties of hops, and one of the most famous hop-growing regions in the world, it damn well better have that strong floral aroma. Now if only Budweiser could actually taste as though it was brewed in the Budweis/Budejovice region of the Czech Republic (oh snap!). (6/1/2008)


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